its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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