We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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