Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize