Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
