dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
