Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
how does that bad decision feel?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
