Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
