Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I deserve this hangover.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
