She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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