Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
