I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
