i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
