Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
