I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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