ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize