im drinking this country out of the recession.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
