Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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