But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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