wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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