the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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