My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
