ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
