booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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