that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
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