You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
