He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
