Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
