Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
