Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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