i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
