You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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