I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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