9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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