Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
My dick has a subreddit
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
