Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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