Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
