Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
My balls are so social today.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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