you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
wow bdsm is so cute
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