it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Can you bring me the toilet please
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
