You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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