Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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