You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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