yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize