i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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