Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Holy shit dude........stairs
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
