some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
