Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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