if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
A+ Viking dick
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
