try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize