Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
