Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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