So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
This baby is an asshole
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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